Questions & Answers

Prospective adoptive families contact us in regard to our experiences with international adoption, travel to China, children’s health issues, orphanage conditions and what to expect overall. We are very happy to share our experiences with others. We are very pleased to share our adoption journeys with anyone wishing information.

Q: Were you able to visit the orphanage, and see the living conditions?

We were not able to visit the orphanage when we traveled in 1996 to Hunan Province. The children were brought to us at our hotel. On the trip to Sichuan Province in 1998 we were able to visit the orphanage to meet our children. The conditions at that orphanage were pleasant and welcoming. The children were brought to us in an office/conference room. We met many of the children's caregivers and the orphanage director. They all cared very much for the children. On our third trip, to Anhui Province, our daughter was brought to us at our hotel after a 3+ hour bus ride. We did, however, have the wonderful opportunity to be able to visit and photograph the orphanage in the city of Hefei. This orphanage was somewhat new and it was not only the local orphanage but also a home for senior citizens. There was a beautiful statue in front of the building of a woman with open arms and two children standing next to her. We were fortunate enough to be able to interact with some of the children living there and some of their nannies. This orphanage was also the home of 3 of the children from our travel group. Their nannies were there to be able to hold the girls for one last time and say good-bye. There were a lot of tears shed from the nannies, the babies, the new parents and, admittedly, all who witnessed the exchange. It was very evident that the nannies were having a difficult time saying good-bye to their beloved charges. It was a wonderful and moving experience, one we will never forget.

Q: Were your children in good health?

Our children came to us in very good health and have continued to be healthy, hearty girls. We have many friends that are also adopted from China and overall the children's health is wonderful. Our pediatrician often makes a joke when we go see him such as "I thought you moved away or something. I hardly ever see you here!" Our third daughter received her routine medical exam immediately upon arriving home. During this exam the doctor gave her the routine skin test for TB. It came back positive. After some other tests and a chest x-ray it was determined that she did not have active TB. We were sent to a specialist for TB. This doctor indicated that our daughter received a vaccine called BCG while in China, and that this vaccine could cause a positive skin test. He wanted to be sure, so we have been giving her daily medication for the treatment of TB. The doctor wanted to be sure that the rest of the family was not exposed so we were all to take the skin test. All of the tests came back negative except for our second daughter. She also received the vaccine BCG in China. Of all the children in our travel group 3 or 4 of the children tested positive for TB. The children are growing and developing beyond all expectations. Our third daughter is in the 95th percentile in height and 85th percentile in weight on the Caucasian growth charts. Except for the precautions we are taking with regard to TB, the children continue to be healthy and strong.

Q: Did you have trouble communicating with your children?

Our daughters were infants when they became a part of our family, so there were no language issues as would probably be the case with an older child. We have traveled with families with a 2 ½-year old and a 3-year old entering their families. There was very little communication at first but as the days progressed it was obvious that they were able to get their messages across. The 3-year old that traveled with us knew about 15 English words within a 10-day period. One of her favorites was "pretty." She also loved the word "shopping."

Q: Have you been able to learn anything about your children's lives in China?

You can expect to obtain some additional information about your child in the legal paperwork that you receive while in China. One of the documents you will receive is the Certificate of Abandonment. This document will give you the information as to where your child was found and on what date. You will also receive a birth certificate and an adoption certificate. You will receive at least 3 copies of each of these important documents.

Q: What information would be most helpful to you if you were just beginning the process of an international adoption?

Let’s see if we can condense al of this in one space. And remember we are Connecticut residents. Your home state may have different requirements.

There are many things that come to mind, but mostly that you need to be patient! Almost everything is out of your control! The only "phase" that you do have control of is the paperwork compilation phase. The paperwork "phase" is time consuming and very reflective. You have to look inside yourself to determine the reasons behind your decision to go through an international adoption. You also MUST contact your local INS office as early in the process as possible. You will have to get fingerprinted as part of your INS approval. For us, the entire INS "phase" has taken up to 60 days. So as not to delay any portion of this "phase" you should make this one of the first things that you do once the process has started. The INS approval is valid for a total of 18 months. Once all of your paperwork is compiled, translated, certified and authenticated you are ready to have your dossier sent to China. You must also remember to check your passport(s) prior to travel. The next "phase" is the WAIT. You wait about 6 to 7 months until you receive THE PHONE CALL to tell you about your child. – this phase has typically been the hardest for us as everything is dependent of the Chinese government to process the paperwork. The next "phase" is preparing for your trip. You are busy getting everything ready at home for the arrival of your child as well as packing and preparing yourself for a trip of a lifetime. An issue that did come up in a recent discussion was about Hepatitis A shots for the travelers. You should speak to your doctor about this, but we received it prior to departure of our first trip. It is a series of two or three shots approximately 4 months apart. Discuss this with your physician early in the waiting phase so you will be protected prior to travel.

Q: Should we plan on bringing for officials and caregivers in China?

We have brought many different small gifts to say thank you to the people that have helped us go through this process. We usually bring about 5 to 10 small gifts. One for the caregiver of the child, one for the orphanage director, one for the notary and there are often others that are helpful. We usually also bring a box of items for the orphanage such as baby aspirin drops, diaper rash cream, shampoo, soap and other essentials for the other children still in their care. We were very fortunate prior to our June 2000 trip to hook up with another adoptive family that lives nearby that had received a very large donation of infant pajamas to be distributed to orphanages in China. They were able to give us 3 dozen of the sleepers to bring to our daughter's orphanage as a donation. The small gifts that we have brought have been travel sizes of cosmetics and toiletries for the nannies, a wallet, some local t-shirts and sports logo items. One thing that we thought was GREAT was some of the families traveling with us were able to find the address for their children's orphanage prior to travel. They packed a small box to include a toy, some clothes and a one-time use camera and sent it to the orphanage director. Some of the children were brought to their families with the clothes that they had sent as well as the toy. Some of the families were also given back the camera to be developed with pictures from the orphanage, the nannies and some of the other children. The family with the 3-year old that traveled with us had done this and she was so proud to show off her own photo album with her friends, her bed, her nanny and the play yard she had known. It was very moving and a wonderful tribute to the orphanage and the world they were leaving behind.

Q: Do you think your children are lucky to be living with you now?

In our day to day lives we have run into many people that have either had this wonderful experience themselves, have known someone else who has or have only nice things to say to our children or us. People often say how lucky our children are - well we must say that WE are the lucky ones! They have made our lives so rich and they give us so much joy. They are truly amazing!

Q: I have another question. Is there some way I can contact you?

Yes! We understand that this information touches on only a small portion of the issues and questions that arise. We would like to invite you to communicate with us if you have been through the process of international adoption, going through the process currently or contemplating the process. Please use our feedback form.